Robin Williams Jokes

The best Robin Williams jokes, quotes and one-liners taken from his long career as a stand-up comedian and film actor.

Name
Robin Williams

Profession
Stand-up comedian and actor

Nationality
American

Links
www.robinwilliams.com

You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the south? Nothing – someone’s losing a trailer…marriage

 

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.misc

 

Who invented the pommel horse? Was it a cowboy with ADD?sport

 

When I was growing up they used to say, “Robin, drugs can kill you.” Now that I’m 58, my doctor’s going, “Robin, you need drugs to live.” And I realise my doctor is my dealer now… and a lot harder to get hold of.medical

 

Divorce. From the Latin word meaning “to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.”marriage

 

Why do they call it rush hour, when nothing moves?misc

 

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