Jokes About Jobs

Jokes about jobs and the people who do them…

My father had a job in a tiddly-winks factory. He didn’t like it… it was counter productive.jobspuns

Alex Horne

Never employ someone who’s obsessed with graphs. They’ll always be plotting behind your back.jobsnerdypuns

Tony Cowards

Doctor Doctor! Do you think your surname influenced your choice of career?jobsmedicalword play

Adam Hess

I used to be a plastic surgeon, which raised a few eyebrows.jobsmedicalpuns

Stewart Francis

A couple of years ago I spent 5 months out of work. Then I had 3 job offers on the same day. Typical – you wait ages for a boss…jobspuns

Rich Allen

I worked as a doctor for the World Health Organisation. I didn’t mean to, I thought I was auditioning for Doctor Who.jobspuns

Milton Jones

I’d like to dedicate this to my father, who was a roofer. So Dad, if you’re up there…jobsword play

Stewart Francis

A hotel has just offered me a job making beds! I think I’ll turn them down.jobspuns

@hi_robb

My dad was a dustman. I didn’t like him coming to collect us from school though. It’s not that I was ashamed he was a dustman, it’s just that you never knew which day he was going to come.jobs

Milton Jones

I used to work in a supermarket. It was my job to hand out samples of things for people to taste. However, I was asked to leave after the little cups of bleach incident.jobs

Milton Jones

I just got a great job helping a one arm typist when she wants to do capital letters. It’s shift work.jobspuns

Tim Vine

The hardest thing about being a trainee proctologist is having to work your way up from the bottom.jobsmedicalpuns

Tony Cowards

If you’re interviewing for an accountancy position, do not promise to give 110%.jobstips

@GCSRecruitment

My grandfather was a small claims court jester.jobsold peoplesurreal

Steven Wright

Gynaecologists. Make your job title less daunting by re-branding yourselves as “Private Investigators”.jobs

@pavanwar

I used to be a mime. It’s only now I can talk about it.jobs

Stewart Francis

I quit my job at the helium gas factory. I refused to be spoken to in that tone.jobs

Stewart Francis

I don’t think I got the job at Microsoft. They haven’t responded to my telegram.jobs

Stewart Francis

I used to be a lifeguard until some blue kid got me fired.jobs

Larry The Cable Guy

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