Christmas Jokes

The best Christmas jokes from some very silly people…

How tight is this? One year my parents got me Hide and Seek for Christmas.christmas

Rhod Gilbert

I was working in a department store and this couple came in. They said, “We want to buy some Christmas presents. When are your opening hours?” I said, “I’m not opening yours, I’m opening mine!”christmas

Tim Vine

People always say “Give blood.” “Give blood.” But it really freaked the kids out at Christmas.christmas

Milton Jones

Somebody bought me a Snuggie as a joke gift. Ha – the joke’s on you – I enjoy it!christmas

Daniel Tosh

Advent calendars – their days are numbered!christmaspuns

Tim Vine

“The European Space Agency land a probe on Comet”
Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph must be worried.christmastopical

Tony Cowards

A Christ is not for dogma.christmasword play

Chris Turner

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.christmas

George Carlin

More Jokes…

If you like Christmas jokes, you’ll also like these:

Easter Jokes
Halloween Jokes